Stephen Albrecht, PhD, Pediatric Psychology
Spectrum Health Medical Group
Helen DeVos Children’s Hospital

A recently published paper entitled “Physical Punishment of Children: Lessons from 20 Years of Research” should give any parent pause when it comes to lifting a hand against their child. The paper, from researchers Joan Durrant, PhD, and Ron Ensom, MSW, of the University of Manitoba in Canada, highlights the risks associated with physical punishment of children, namely, that there is a substantially higher risk of negative development outcomes when corporate punishment is used.

As the authors note in their paper: “Physicians familiar with the research can now confidently encourage parents to adopt constructive approaches to discipline and can comfortably use their unique influence to guide other aspects of children’s healthy development.”

Which brings me to the point of this blog posting: What can you, as a community pediatrician or family practitioner, do to encourage these constructive approaches? What do these constructive approaches look like? Here is some advice to provide parents with a “toolbox” from which to manage their child’s behavior.

• Use the concept of a “toolbox” approach. Obviously, the reaction to a child running into a busy street or hitting his sister should differ from the response to a child who won’t eat her peas.
• Emphasize what the child should do rather than what the child shouldn’t do. Instead of saying, “You better not leave your peas again tonight,” say, “Eating vegetables is such a cool thing to do; it not only fills you up, but gives you lots of energy.”
• Encourage parents to praise the good behavior rather than focus on the bad behavior. You may know this as “catch them doing good.” Over time, research shows, this approach can result in behavioral changes in the child and improved parent/child dynamics.
• For children who are “acting out,” try to understand what triggers the behavior and then work to avoid or change those triggers. Perhaps the child tends to “act out” when he’s tired or hungry—triggers that can be addressed. We call this the ABC approach:
  • Identify the Antecedent
  • Target the Behavior
  • Provide the Consequences
• Have the parent list behaviors they can and cannot ignore, the classic “pick your battle” approach. For instance, maybe they can ignore or only mildly reprimand a child who doesn’t make his bed, but not doing homework requires a bigger “tool” from the toolbox. 

What’s important to remember is that every family is different and every family needs different tools in their disciplinary toolbox. One tool they don’t need, however, is physical punishment.

Resources:

 I recommend the following resources to my patients’ parents; you might want to do the same.

• Parenting the Strong-Willed Child: The Clinically Proven Five-Week Program for Parents of Two- to Six-Year-Olds, by Rex Forehand and Nicholas Long
• 1-2-3 Magic: Effective Discipline for Children 2-12, by Thomas W. Phelan, PhD
• SOS: Help for Parents, by Lynn Clark, PhD
• Your Defiant Child: Eight Steps to Better Behavior, by Russell A. Barkley

What tools do you recommend to parents? Click "Add Comment" below to join the conversation.